Privilege

I am really struggling with this sense of privilege here that is sometimes quite overwhelming. I’ve always been seen as a pretty average in America. It’s been difficult to stand out as much as I do here in Taigu. I think it is as close as I will ever come to celebrity status—everyone knows our faces, our names, watches our every move, wants our patronage, wants to visit us and ask us about our everyday lives. And we live in these houses that are so much nicer than those of the average teacher here, and have our own bathroom, a kitchen and shower (with water pressure that does not turn off at 11pm like in the dorms). Moreover, everyone knows we are young, but have enough money to come visit here, have enough privilege to come visit their country with nothing more than a VISA (when it is nearly impossible for them to visit America), and that we get paid a lot compared to the average Chinese wages.
It takes a good conversation with a Chinese student to remind me that I am human too. But sometimes even then I realize that I have been born into speaking the international language that they will always struggle to speak smoothly. I much prefer speaking Mandarin with Chinese friends here. It reminds me that I will always struggle with some things. :)